Rizal, 2016

Last weekend was one of the most memorable weekends of my life.

Packed my bags at Thursday night before I went to sleep. It was heavy and I think I got all the things I needed for the next day's trip. After lunch in Friday, I needed to be in Sangandaaan, Caloocan at 2 PM and since I don't know how to get there, I left the house at 11:30 just in case I would be lost. (laughs). Good thing there is a lady in the jeepney who helped me get to my destination, I was able to get there on time.

My friend, Christ, fetched me at 7-eleven after their school meeting. He is actually the one who invited me to go with his friends/workmates in a volunteer work in Rizal. He always tells me how fun it is to be with them and since they are all pioneers, they treat each other like family.  I am so excited to meet them too, and in a way, this is like a celebration for his new privilege in their congregation as a new ministerial servant (Congratulations!).

I was introduced to them and most of them are affiliated in Baesa Congregation. That brings back memories because when I was a kid, I used to play in the parking lot of the Kingdom Hall. It is adjacent to the apartment my aunt had boarded when I was still an elementary school student. I also remembered my aunt taking me to the meetings in that congregation. Small world, when I met Ate Mina and she learned my middle name, she immediately remembered someone from their congregation, an old friend, which turned out to be my aunt who now lives in a different city and whom they haven't seen for so long.

Jesus' words in John 13:34-35 are really true because really, when you meet people who belong to Jehovah's organization, you will really feel like you have known each other for a long time and you love them already. They also made me feel like someone who just visits an old friend. Hours later, we loaded our things to the car and headed out.

Ate Mina has given us our task schedule so we could be organized in our stay. I don't know the people behind these names, of course, but they seem to be happy people as I met them in the school faculty (meeting place). 

We played some games while on the way and I kind of felt dizzy because I am used to just sleeping in vehicle rides. But these people seemed very energetic all the time. I couldn't keep up. Haha.

Krisnyl reminded me of my friend back in college. She is a pretty girl who is a little boyish. Meriam is a silent girl who seems to bottle things up. Bok is not that talkative but when he speaks, he seemed to be so smart. I couldn't read Derek but he seems to be a nice person too. I easily got well with Ate Mina because she is very thoughtful and welcoming; And Kuya Boyet is easy to talk with. He listens well when someone is speaking. They are all wonderful people to to get to know with. 

We reached Binangonan at around 8:00 PM. We were welcomed by Jepte, a brother, who was their old friend. Ate Mina told me that he was a friend whom they knew when they volunteered in a preaching work in Daraitan. He was jolly and very accommodating. I will never forget the delicious meal he cooked for us. Dinner was fun and they did a lot of catching up.

We tried to hit the sack early (?) because we planned to go preaching the next day.

We prepared our magazines and waited for the others to arrive before we started the field service meeting. A pioneer name Dang, and his brother, Edward, arrived. They were with Jayde, an unbaptised publisher in their congregation. We were introduced to one another. I felt excited to start the preaching work because I want to know what kind of territory is that place. This time, Emy will be my partner.

Emy is very sweet and she is actually adorable. Aside from being pretty, she is really effective in preaching. She knows how to adjust to people and actually, I learned a lot of things from her, despite her being younger than me. 

The territory was a fruitful one. We talked to a lot of people interested in knowing the truth. The territory is also wide and it's like a mixture of an urban and a rural area, with you walking in the middle of modern houses surrounded with vast mountains. The place is not that polluted too and I noticed, it is like an escape from the noisy Caloocan City. 

Too bad this is the only photo we had.

We went to the grocery after the field service. There is an SM branch in Angono so we bought supplies there for the remaining days of our stay. Christ and Bok went with Jayde in his Bible studies. Jepte said a family invited us over for dinner so after lunch, we took a nap and prepared to go when we woke up.

In the room, while preparing. With Meriam, Ate Mina, and Krisnyl.

We decided to take a walk in the village first before going to Sister Caling's house. Roselynd Homes is a nice neighborhood, with many vacant lots and a nice view of the mountain tops.

Spotted a rest-house at the top? 

The weather was also really nice this time, although it drizzled in the afternoon.

Finally, the sky went a little dark and we knew we had to go. Joram, Jepte's younger brother fetched us. He was nice and friendly and we easily got along with him.

Time to go.

Sister Caling and her kids are very warm. They cooked spaghetti for dinner. Her kids were entertaining us with random stuff and they are really smart. They don't speak like elementary school students. JM, particularly, likes riddles and stories that will make him think hard. I was amazed with how he computed distances and other things while Kuya Boyet was sharing stories. We also played some games and I think they enjoyed. It was uplifting and fun at the same time.

We went home happy that night.

Jepte, who seems to be in a habit of entering his room and not going out after hours did it again. (Haha! Peace! :p) I was able to sleep at almost 2:30 but I woke up at 5 a.m the next morning. I wasn't able to sleep well, probably because I am still adjusting. Ate Tess couldn't sleep too and yet she was earlier than me. I heard her moving at 4 a.m. and the next thing I knew, she was already cooking breakfast.

We are all so excited with Kuya Boyet's talk and although her wife heard it so many times, I know we still share the same feeling. Joram fetched us again. We arrived in the Kingdom Hall 5 minutes before the meeting started.

Kuya Boyet's talk was really a good one. His talk is about how love manifests the true Christian congregation, If there are some things that I wouldn't forget they are the illustrations.

"Once you erased what you have written with a pencil, you don't trace your mistakes anymore. "

"No matter how light the weight of a thing is, if you hold it for a long time, it will eventually feel heavy. So no matter how little the mistake of your brother is, if you will not forget it, it will be a burden to you."

Yes, it is sometimes hard to just forget a person's mistake and shortcoming, particularly if we were hurt but love covers everything. A timely reminder for all of us, who experience being hurt by someone all the time.

The Bible reminds us that:

"Love... doesn't keep account of the injury." -- 1 Corinthians 13:5

I felt the warmth of the people in the congregation after the meeting. The brothers are very welcoming. Bloomingdale Congregation has many publishers and it is noteworthy, how their youth are very active and approachable.

We met a child named, Anthony. He has a disability and even if it is a challenge, his mother still takes him to the Kingdom Hall every Sunday to hear the talks. He cannot control his limbs but he can control his feet and upon hearing us greeting him, he became really happy and waved his foot at us. Anthony may not speak, but I know he felt the brotherly love we felt for him. Her mother inspired me in so many things. 

Anthony in the middle of us, sitting in his wheel chair.

We were also introduced to the friendly brothers in the congregation. One brother here, Kuya Benjie, who lives in a the house a few steps away from Jepte's house invited us over for dinner and karaoke for that night. 

The Caling siblings also attended the meeting. I wasn't able to say goodbye properly to their mother because she was busy rehearsing her part in the Thursday meeting.

After the meeting, Joram drove us home again.

However, we decided to eat out so we headed to SM Angono and spent the afternoon there.

Kuya Boyet and the other boys went to buy some groceries for today's meals. Us girls just spent time goofing around and taking pictures. I realized, Emy and I have a lot of photos together. Haha!

While waiting for the others to come back, we just spent some time idly. 

Since they were sitting outside Krispy Kreme, Ate Mina had a craving for some doughnuts and so she got a dozen. 

Nothing beats coffee and doughnuts so we headed to the coffee shop in front of it to have some coffee. 

Thanks to the ever so generous Derek for the coffee. However, I got really disappointed when the barrista gave me an iced cappuccino. I never order cold drinks in Starbucks (ever!) and this if the first time. How will I enjoy my coffee? :(( I just enjoyed it though, with the help of additional cinnamon, vanilla, and sugar. (LOL) And with these people, you won't mind the taste of your coffee because you are with good company. 

That afternoon, Jepte and Christ cooked for dinner. Krisnyl and I tried to help them prepare but I felt a headache, probably because I wasn't able to sleep well for the previous nights. I tried to take a nap and when I was just dozing off,  Krisnyl woke me up and asked me to move into our room. I wasn't able to sleep after that anymore. I enjoyed talking to her. She has a lot of interesting stories and partly, I saw myself in her. She has some ideas and responses that were really the same as mine when I was her age. Hours later, my headache became worse. The others went to the field service and I regretted it. If should've gone with them if I knew I won't be able to take a nap when I badly need it. 

I tried to sleep again when they arrived. I can't remember if I did but all I knew was when the others came back from preaching, they asked us to go to Kuya Benjie's house since many of those from the congregation who were in the field service are already there. 

We ate dinner and played some games (as usual). Christ facilitated 2 of the games and the other one was facilitated with Kuya Boyet. It was a nice bonding for all of us. I will not forget what Kuya Benjie said, "Age is just a number for the people inside Jehovah's organization." It is amazing to think that no matter how old or how young a person is, we all treat each other equally. Everyone participated with all the games and activities. It was a night full of laughter and spiritual encouragements. 

We closed the gathering by sharing everyone's favorite Bible texts, I am surprised with how everyone explained how they were motivated and uplifted by their favorite scriptures. Some of their words really touched my heart. Sometimes, you won't know a person unless he started speaking about his faith. 

Even after most of them went home, Kuya Benjie asked us to do karaoke with him. We spent the night singing until 12 a.m. Yeah. Really. 

The next morning, Monday, we prepared early. Too bad, this is the time for us to say good bye. We prepared as early as we can because we planned to go to Angono Lakeside Park.A lot of people visit the lakeside early in the morning to jog, exercise, or to just walk around. I was just putting my clothes on when I heard the beep of Joram's car. He was fetching us again. 

We stayed there for several minutes.

Ate Mina and other girls joined the ladies doing zumba in the central park area. Some went jogging. I just took a walk. 

There were some fishermen waiting for fishes to surface the water. Kuya Boyet asked them how do they do it and a young fisherman, while holding his gun, explained kindly. He even lent his polaroid glasses for us to check how do they see the waters with naked eye, and compare it with glasses on. 

We didn't stay in the place long. We left after several hours to go to Rizal Windmills. 

Couple shirt! :p

It was a bit of a long ride to the windmills and I got really sleepy. I woke up with the sound of their laughter. We are approaching the elevated roads and there are many motorcyle riders alongside our car. I was amazed with how big the windmills are. It was also very windy when we alight the car.

We stayed there for almost an hour, enjoyed the wind and played a game. We also enjoyed the view, overlooking the lower part of the city.

It was nice to spend time there. It was a little crowded though, since many riders go there too. 

We need to be on the way to Manila at 1 p.m. so we left the place before lunch, A brother in another congregation, invited us for lunch. He is Kuya Dong, a brother they met when they volunteered in Daraitan. I heard a lot of good things about him and I am also excited to meet him and his family. 

When we arrived in Kuya Dong's place, foods are already prepared. Ate Mina told me about how good their home-made siopao is and she was right. It was a family business and they really mastered making it. He also cooked a lot of dishes popular in their place and he was a good cook. We were introduced to one another and some other sisters arrived. As usual, we played another game and asked each other's Facebook account before leaving. 

 I went back to Caloocan happy, recharged, and acquired new friends. Hashtag 'blessed.'

Catching Up

Nothing beats the feeling of meeting an old friend after several years. Last time I've seen Ate Naty was in my best friend's wedding. She attended by surprise. She didn't say she will travel all the way from the province to Manila and surprised us with her arrival. When she went back to her town, years passed without us meeting again.

It was last Sunday. Because of the comfortability the rain was giving to people who loves sleeping so much, I woke up late. I was in a hurry and well, I am always disoriented when I am in a hurry so I left my phone. It was still raining but still, a lot attended the Sunday meeting. After the meeting, Llamin, a friend younger than me asked me to write her a speech for her school project so I spent almost an hour writing it. It was already 1:30 when I finished and the rain started pouring again. I have to spend thirty minutes or more in commuting and I know I will be late. Too bad, I still have to go back home and get my phone before heading to the meeting place. When I went back home, I still needed to change because the rain soaked me.

I arrived in FT at almost 3 PM. Ruth, Iyah, and Ate Naty was already there waiting for me.

I was so embarassed. But yey! I was there and I saw her at last. She's still the same. And you know the drill, catching up while waiting for the food to arrive. We took a mojito first and it was so good. They say it is one of the best sellers in Burgoo. The food is awesome too but I think they should also provide dips that go along with it because for me, the dip doesn't match. 

Thanks to Facebook, we've been keeping in touch with each other for a while and we learned that she and her husband (too bad I failed to attend her wedding) are visiting Kingdom Halls around the city as LDC representatives. It is like a CO's visit, but they focus more on constructing, renovating, and fixing Kingdom Halls. We're happy for her spiritual achievements. This week, they were assigned in one of the KH's near our place so we arranged to meet before they go visit other places again.

We spent hours of talking and sharing stories each other missed. She was surprised with all the things that took place when she wasn't with us and we also shared some spiritual encouragements with one another. It's fun to talk to friends who have the same spiritual outlook and it is really uplifting. Anyway, we decided to go and see Iyah's kids in her Mom's house for Ate Naty to see them. Last time she saw Iyah, she was still pregnant. It was fun bonding with the kids, of course. 

Ate Naty has to go, though. A local congregation which accommodated them set up a  congregation gathering and she has to be there. We understand, of course and we know this will not be the last. Will definitely miss her. 

* * * * * 

Photos owned by: Iya Pacao

13 Life Lessons from the film Birdman [The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance] (2014)

Birdman is a comedy-drama film directed by Alejandro G. Iñárritu. He even co-wrote the script with other collaborators. He  unconventionally told the story in a constant moving steadicam shots, digitally enhanced to create uninterrupted single shot idea. 

The film is considered by many critics as a breakthrough in modern film making because of the story and other technicalities but since I am not a film critic, I am not going to talk about those things. 

Riggan Thompson, the main character in the film is played by Michael Keaton, who we all know because of Batman. Now he plays the role of Riggan, who was once at the peak of his career by starring in a superhero film 'Birdman'. Now,  with his career flagging, he tried to revive it by writing, directing, and acting in a theater play he adopted from a short story, proving that he is still the same Riggan Thompson who had enormous fans and a hit actor. 

As a theater enthusiast myself, this film stirred my passion once again because it made the theater career a very noble one. It is a film about a man's inner struggle to find love and acceptance by using the world of theater as an outlet and opportunity to channel his frustrations. Finding love and acceptance? That's something we all can relate. However, there are actually so many things we can relate to in the film and here are some of them: 

A thing is a thing, not what is said of that thing. 

1. STOP JUDGING 

I am not an exception when it comes to judging people because we all have that habit within ourselves. Sometimes, the way I treat a person is based on what others told me about that person. But most of the times, it causes more harm than good, not just to the person but more particularly to me. 

I remember in college, there was this girl who is in the same major as me who seemed to be a very cool person. My classmates used to tell me a lot of negative things about her and that sort of affected my view of her. Later on, we met at an organization meeting (she sat next to me and even approached me) and I was surprised with how well we got along with each other. It was very surprising because she was the total opposite of what was said about her. We're good friends till now. 

You see, instances like this are very common and we sometimes can't avoid it either way, to judge or to be judged. However, we all have to think twice before verbalizing our thoughts. Casual talks can easily turn to gossips that can tarnish a person's reputation. Just listening to these talks make us accountable for it because we can be a medium of information and allow bad information to spread ahead. When these things happen, we always have a choice whether to allow that information to spread or to steer it away from harmful results. Speak good words and don't overreact. At least you did something not to turn something to what is said about them. 

"I got a chance to do something right. I got to take it. I got to."

~ Riggan Thomson

2. GRAB OPPORTUNITIES 

We have plenty of opportunities everyday and we either grab them or we miss them. Business magnates are not what they are today if they didn't grab the opportunities life offered them. We miss opportunities by sidelining ourselves saying we can't do it or we don't have what  it takes. But that shouldn't be our thinking. When we miss opportunities, our "confidence declines too and the downward spiral of hopes begins". I can't remember where did I read that but it really stayed in my head and makes me motivated all the time. 

"It's funny I was sitting here waiting for you and all of a sudden I couldn't remember why we broke up."

~Sylvia to Riggan 

3. COVER BAD THINGS WITH LOVE 

Anger ruins everything. We are all made of unique qualities so no matter how compatible people are with each other, misunderstandings can still arise. Why? Because no two people are exactly alike. One single misinterpretation can cause anger which turns situations bad. 

No matter how heated the argument is, if you love the person, cover the shortcomings with love. I know this is not an easy thing to do but with an open mind, try to identify the underlying issues and consider if it was really a serious thing. Serious things need calm discussions, not anger. There are more benefits in forgiving than in making the matters worse.

Forgiving and forgetting goes hand in hand. You don't have to recall how the other person has hurt you or what the other person said that caused that painful feeling. In my case, I know I have forgiven the person when I don't know why we fought. And that's a good feeling right there. 

"The last time I flew here from LA, George Clooney was sitting two seats in front of me with a nice pair of cufflinks and that... chin. We ended up flying through this really, really horrible storm. I mean the plane was like rattling and shaking, and all the people on board are cying, praying, right? I just sat there. They're crying, I sit there. And I'm thinking, Oh boy, the next morning, when Sam looks at the paper it's going to be Clooney's face on the front page, not mine... Did you know Farrah Fawcett died the exact same day as Michael Jackson? Is that crazy?" 

~Riggan Thompson

4. MAKE A DIFFERENCE 

Riggan told his ex-wife these words because he wants her to understand why he is doing the things that he is doing. He wants to make a difference and be known to the world, not just someone who died with George Clooney. Okay, I know not all of us can have the chance to become Bill Gates, or Madonna, or Tom Hanks, or whoever superstar you have in mind but trust me, we can all make a difference. 

Making a difference in this world doesn't mean you have to be rich or popular or genius. Maraming tao ang papansin sa Internet sites dahil lang sa gusto nilang sumikat at makilala sa mundo ng mga taong wala nang ibang ginawa kundi ang mabuhay sa social media. (And yes! I want that to be in Tagalog for emphasis!) But is that really what making a difference mean? Is that how we measure success? Seriously, what happened to this world? I can't tell you what success means because we all have our own connotation about it and we differ depending on our area of interests but for me, being successful is when you're doing your best in what you do with the feeling of contentment that you are not in want of anything else. If you can find work, stay healthy, find somebody to share it with, you're the ultimate success (Confessions of a Dangerous Mind).

This world only follows what the society think is right. We can make a difference by opposing this idea. Now because everyone is into the new Pokemon Go doesn't mean you have to try it. Not because everyone loves Prada doesn't mean you have do buy it. Now because everyone hates Justine Beiber doesn't mean you have to hate him too. That's making a difference. Standing up with your opinions and being yourself. Don't just follow. Lead. 

Riggan: "Why did we break up?"

Sylvia: "Just because I didn't like that ridiculous comedy you did with Goldie Hawn did not mean that I did not love you. That's what you always do. You confuse love for admiration." 

5. DEFINE LOVE 

Oh, that sounds like a question in a high school slum book, remember(?), when you used to write "love is blind" or "love is like a water that flows forever". I used to answer that question with a copy-pasted quote from authors I love. But enough of the high-schoolish definition of love.

The reason why I don't believe in love at first sight is because seeing someone's beauty isn't the same as loving. I think I should define it more like an admiration than love and that's two totally different things. The word 'admiration' is defined by dictionaries as 'a feeling of delighted approval and liking'. Love, on the other hand is defined as 'have a great affection or liking for'. No wonder people confuse the two as the same.

The love-at-first-sight notion implies that true love is just a feeling—an overpowering emotion that grips you when you meet the right someone—that such love just happens, and that it requires little effort or knowledge of the other person. Real love, however, is much more than a feeling. Granted, feelings are involved, but love is a profound human bond that also includes principles and values and that never ceases to grow, providing it is properly nurtured and maintained.*

Most of us are influenced by the Internet and media by fairytale definitions of love and the common involvement of sex and romance. In popular culture, we are surrounded with the idea that we can't be satisfied with our partners and we cannot be satisfied with ourselves too. Media romance and genuine love are quite confusing, yes. Media romance is so full of admiration and we must not confuse it with love because it is, most of the times, short-termed.

"A man becomes a critic when he cannot be an artist the same way that a man becomes an informer when he cannot be a soldier."

~Mike Shiner 

6. DON'T JUST AGREE

Mike Shiner qouted those words from Gustave Flaubert, a French novelist whom we all know from his novel Madame Bovary. He was saying these words to Tabitha, the antagonist in the film to sort of terrorize her about giving a grave review on their play.

However, if we think about it, not everyone who becomes an informant was rejected from being a soldier; and not every critic wanted to be an artist. Their job is to open our eyes on the things that artists have to improve. If an artist is really good, there is no way he will be afraid of the critics. So I don't agree with Shiner or Flaubert in this statement.

I guess artists should be motivated to do well by trying to consider what their critics are saying, not use those words to loose their confidence and self-motivation. After all, a bad review makes someone realize what he has to change.

However, I think Flaubert is pointing his finger to those who criticize other people without truly knowing what they are saying only to pull a person down.

"You are not doing this for the sake of art, you are doing this to feel relevant again. Well, guess what? There's an entire world of people fighting to be relevant every single day! And you act like it doesn't exist. Things are happening in the place that you ignore. A place that by the way has already forgotten about you! You're doing this because you are scared to death like the rest of us, that you don't matter. And you know what, you're right. You don't!" 

~Sam Thompson 

7. FACE THE REALITY

Fighting for our self-relevance can sometimes be intoxicating. Most people now measure a person's worth based on the likes he gets in an Instagram post or how many friends he has in Facebook, or how many views his videos in Youtube are while he's eating something gross or basically doing something stupid, or how many followers are there in his Twitter account. That's the reason why a lot of us are doing foolish things to get these attention from random beings in the Internet just to prove our existence or worse, to measure our relevance in this world.

But let's face it. Every person is fighting the same battle and while someone may get ahead of all of us, in the end, we might still forget that person. Not everyone in this world is given a shot in life when you become Einstein who still lives even if he's dead. That's the reality.

"I guess we make choices in life and we choose to live with them. Or not."

~Laura Aulburn 

8. FACE THE CONSEQUENCES 

Decisions, after it's been done, whether right or wrong, cannot be changed. I have done too many bad decisions in my life and I live with all the consequences. I chose not to live with other effects though, because I choose not to get sad in this life. Most of you are like me because, well, we face decisions everyday. Decisions, even the smallest one has an effect in future actions and outcomes. Being depressed about something that has already been done is useless. Consider every consequence of our action as another chance to do what is right. But never be afraid to do something wrong nor force yourself to being perfect. No one can do that.

"I've always dreamed of being a Broadway actress since I was a little kid. And now I'm here, and I'm... I'm not a Broadway actress I'm still just a little kid. And I keep waiting for someone to tell me I made it."

~Lesley Truman  

9. HAPPINESS ISN'T ALWAYS GETTING WHAT YOU WANT 

Remember the saying, "Be careful what you wish for 'cause you just might get it"? I thought of this clause after I heard Lesley said the words. Some poeple spend their lifetime striving for careers they want only to end up unhappy. Sometimes there are things that we don't like but when they happens, we are surprised with how happy they make us.

"You've been hangin' around here trying to make yourself invisible behind this little routine of yours but you can't. You're anything but invisible. You're big. You're kind of a great mess. It's like a candle burning at both ends, but it's beautiful." 

~ Mike Shiner 

10. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL 

I always remind myself the same words at times I think about my failures. I always compare myself to other who do better than me but I don't feel good with these thoughts. So instead of reminding myself about my insecurities and shortcomings, I just always tell myself that I am beautiful in my own way. No matter what kind of mess will I be.

There is always more to you than what's seen with the eyes. You may not feel it but in this world, every person has their beauty and you don't have to feel small and feel invisible because you might be the world for someone. You might neglect the people who love you for you, not for the image this world wants to turn you. You have your experiences. You have your ideas. You have your creativity. Every person has a story and your story, no matter how scary, sad, or depressing is still beautiful in its own way.

So just in case you need a reminder, you are beautiful.

"I wasn't even present in my own life and now I don't have it."

~Riggan Thompson

11. LIVE YOUR MOMENTS

I think, this part here is the saddest of all. There was a scene when Riggan told his wife about Sam's birth recalling that he was busy taking the video that the feeling of having a child missed him because he seemed not there. This made me think about how I really live the moments in my life. Am I absent when I'm surrounded by friends? Are my thoughts in the place where I am? We make our mind busy wandering in a zone where our body is not present at the moment. This is wasting time. Your mind should be in the place where your body is. There is a time for contemplating about people or places or circumstances. Live the moment where you are than remember that moment as a time that supposedly had given you happiness, but you were not in it.

It's a beautiful day. Forget about the Times... everyone else has. Come on. Stand up! So you're not a great actor. Who cares? You're much more than that... You are larger than life, man. 

~Young Birdman 

12. YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN WHAT OTHERS EXPECT OF YOU 

Make this as your motivation whenever you feel like you can't do things. Choices are always in your hands whether to prove them right or exceed their expectations. But what if you didn't exceed 'their' expectations? Will that matter? No. Who cares? If someone tells you are not a good one in something you think you can do best, let them think that way. You are the only person who knows your limit. You might not know your potential but you can always improve yourself and do better than what you can do yesterday.

Sam: "Truth or dare?"

Mike Shiner: "Truth."

Sam: "That's boring."

Mike Shiner: "Truth is always more interesting."

13. GO FOR THE TRUTH 

When you look at a person, you are not looking at the view of the turmoil inside him. Behind every person is a story of struggle and success. The question of "how"  did you happen to be the person you are today is very important. Just like the words of Chelsea Clinton, "The 'how' question is very important in life" because it reveals about the truth. There is always more than what we just see and what we just hear. I am always fascinated with people's back story. I am always fascinated with how things are done before they become the product they are right in front of me. The truth is not always easy to know but it is really something worth searching for.

- - - - - - - -

Late Night Food Tripping Buddies

It is one heck of a day at work and I can't wait to finish my tasks because of the excitement of meeting my two amazing friends, Kharen and Jholan. After work, I headed to the nearest coffee shop and I almost bumped into its glass door because I was in a hurry. That would be quite a funny sight for the guard. Good thing I realized it in split seconds. When I stepped inside, Kharen was sitting at the far corner of the room, waiting for us.

Jholan arrived several minutes after me. We stayed in the place until the barrista approached us to ask for our last order since the shop is closing. And because nothing beats fries late at night, we headed to the fast food restaurant around the corner from the coffee shop. Late night coffee and snack will always be great with these ladies.

It was 2 AM. We decided to stay the night at Jholan's place. After breakfast, we watched Upside Down, a 2012 film online after watching a handful of trailers from Youtube. It was romantic-fantasy movie that has very common plot holes and and visually boring. I am not a film critic but I must say, well, I just didn't like the film.

After watching it, we felt hungry. I felt some craving for shawarma and Kharen seemed to read my mind and suggested we have some shawarma for lunch. Novaliches has a shawarma restaurant that offers affordable but really delicious shawarma in pita or rice. You don't live in Novaliches if you don't know this place and probably a lot have been there already.

That was 4 PM and I think that shouldn't be considered as lunch anymore. Anyway, a common friend/acquaintance was there and we took advantage of the time to catch up with her.

13 Life Lessons from the Film Under the Tuscan Sun (2003)

Under the Tuscan Sun is an American romantic comedy drama film in 2003. It is loosely based on the book Under the Tuscan Sun: At Home in Italy by an American author, university professor, poet, and literary reviewer, Frances Mayes. 

The story is about Frances, who is then struggling in writing her latest book when her husband filed a divorce to marry the woman he was having an affair with. Because her life totally changed after the divorce, she eventually accepts her best friend, Patti's offer of a vacation because Patti thinks she needed an intervention after the depressing incident. The vacation trip was a gay tour in Tuscany which was originally purchased by Patti and her lesbian partner Grace. 

During the trip, she bought a villa in Cortona and begins a new life there, with the help of interesting yet calm characters. 

Bramasole as seen from the movie.

I was actually a bit hesitant to watch it because the trailer looked a bit boring for me but there is something about the title that makes me want to watch it and I never regret spending more than an hour. Moreover, Diane Lanes portrayal of Frances Mayes is so natural. 

The film teaches us a lot of lessons about life. Here are some of them: 

"It doesn't actually kill you, like a bullet to the heart or a head-on car wreck.  It should. When someone you've promised to cherish till death do you part says "I never loved you", it should kill you instantly. You shouldn't have to wake up day after day trying to understand how in the world you didn't know. The light just never went on, you know. I must have known of course but I was too scared to see the truth. Then fear just makes you so stupid." ~Frances 

1. FEAR MAKES PEOPLE STUPID

Alright. So Mayes was talking about divorce here but we can all think of love in the same way, when someone who promised you a lot of things would break the promises eventually. There are times when we really know about the infidelity but we act blind and pretend we don't know it because we are too scared to loose the person or the person we are when we are with them. But that has to change. We should never be afraid. We should never be afraid because we are all worthy of a loyal love and we shall not stoop our levels down just to be with a person who doesn't see our worth. 

(which leads us to...)

Frances:  (to herself) "You are so stupid to buy a house for a life you don't even have."

Senior Martini: "Why did you do it then?"

Frances: "Because I'm sick of being afraid all the time and because I still want things."

2. STOP BEING AFRAID

No one has the right to stop us to do what we want to do. People are stuck in the four corners of their safe zones because they are afraid to get out and start pursuing the things they want. No matter what the results of the decisions might be, the benefit will still be yours. Either you "succeed" or you 
"learn". 

"Between Austria and Italy there is a section of the Alps called the Semmering. It is an impossibly steep very high part of the mountains. They built a train track over these Alps to connect Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks even before there was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built it because they knew someday the train would come." 

~Senior Martini 

3. HAVE FAITH 

Not because bad things happen doesn't mean no good things will come our way. It is always a choice between staying in a bad situation and doing something to change it. With faith, your actions will always be equipped with motivations and hope that everything will be fine in the end. It is always better to be motivated than to be negative. 

"Regrets are a waste of time. They're past crippling you in the present. 

~Katherine 

4. DON'T WALLOW ON REGRETS

There are times when we spend time thinking of the bad/hurtful/embarassing things that we did in the past but newsflash! You already did it. Nothing can erase the fact that what's done is done and no matter how you cry or be embarassed or be mad about it, it's over. So choose to forget and move on. 

"There's only so much you can take before there comes a time when you really just have to get out."

~Frances 

5. EVERYBODY HAS A LIMIT.


This is so right for me. There are times when I really take all the bad things that people are doing and I'd like to pretend that I am not hurt because I want to please them. Then there was one time when they totally reached my limit and I just exploded. I said hurtful things and insults and other things that was inside me for a long time and I regretted what I did and said after that. Sometimes it's not good to wait till you reach your limits. But sometimes, you will only know your limits till you reach it. 

"When I was a little girl, I used to spend hours looking for ladybugs. Finally, I just gave up and fall asleep in the grass. When I woke up, they were crawling all over me."

~Katherine

6. WHEN YOU GET TIRED, REST.

Things has a way of showing up when you are not finding. We all have that time when we spend time looking for something (or someone) that/who isn't there and when we finally give up, it shows up. Life has lots of opportunities and surprises, don't stress yourself too much. You will eventually get it when you least expect it. 

"If you smashed into something good, you should hold on until it's time to let go."

-Marcelo 

7. HOLD ON.

Not all good things are forever. So while we still have time, hold on to it. However, if it's time to let go, don't be afraid of loosing your grip. What matters is you became happy while it is still there. 

People have their way of pushing people who love them and I think that's stupidity. People come and go. Appreciate them while you still have them. Don't be too sad when people let go of you or when you come across a friend who became a stranger. That's probably the time to let go. Just remember the happy times you had together and you will not regret knowing the person. 

Patti: "I refuse to screw up your love life." 

Frances: "Don't be ridiculous Patti. You are my love life." 

8. GOOD FRIENDS WILL ALWAYS BE THERE NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS OR NO MATTER HOW FAR YOU ARE FROM EACH OTHER. 

Patti surprised Frances one day in her doorstep. She travelled all the way from San Francisco to Tuscany just to see Frances. When Frances learned about Patti's breakup with her partner, she never left her side. 

Frances chose Patti over her boyfriend Marcelo several times because Patti is someone "important". She was on her way to Marcelo when Patti needed her but she stayed beside Patti. True friends will never leave you.  

"You know who I really love the most from all the films? Cabiria. You remember at the end when another man has left her in the most terrible way, and she thinks it's all over for her? Then she sees some children playing in the street, making music and before she knows it she is smiling again."  

~Katherine 

9. FIND HAPPINESS IN GRIEF.

Sadness sucks all the energy in a person and it resurrects all the negativities your heart has no matter how long it was forgotten. Don't be an island when you're depressed. Go out, enjoy the sunshine, feel the grass, smell the flowers, watch the children, enjoy music. It's the little things that give us joy. Okay, I know this may sound like a bit of a cliche but trust me, it works. You may not forget what happened immediately but a second of smile in your face diminishes the loneliness. 

"No matter what happens, always keep your childish innocence. It's the most important thing." 

~Katherine 

10. KEEP YOUR CHILDISH INNOCENCE.

When I was a kid, I want to grow up immediately. I wanted to do what people older than me are doing. Now at 27, I miss my childhood and if there is one thing I would like to go back into, that was when I was 10. Well, we all know that could never happen. We are grown ups now but there are times when we still enjoy licking an ice cream, dancing in the rain. eating lollipops, blowing bubbles, finding the shapes in the clouds, or licking the bowl. Who cares? Our childish innocence makes us young again. 

"Happy is about a lot of things. It's not just about young passion."

~Chiara's Mother 

11. USE YOUR BRAIN.

We all fall in love. I don't know about you but I always equip my emotions with proper reasoning and thinking before I get into a relationship. Haha! I respect your ideas about love and passion and relationships but happiness doesn't just depend on love. It depends on so many things. When I was a teenager, I thought I was really, totally, overly, head over heels with one person but as I mature, my standards changed. What I like when I was 15 was so different when I was 20 which was so different when I was 25 which was so different from now. Point is, we can never trust young passion. But don't lecture me about contentment. Been there. Done that. 

Frances: "A love that last foreveer" 

Chiara's Father: "What you describe is all in fairytales."

Frances: "No it's not"

Chiara's Father: "And how do you know? From personal experience? "

Frances: "No, I looked for it and I didn't find it but it doesn't mean it doesn't exist."

12. FOREVER EXISTS.

The word "forever" will not be invented at the first place if it doesn't exist. Not because most relationships around you did not succeed doesn't mean forever is impossible. Not because unfaithfulness and deceit are common in our society doesn't mean everyone will do that. Love fades if only you'll let it. 

"Unthinkably good things can happen even late in the game. It's such a surprise."

~Frances 

13. LET LIFE SURPRISE YOU 

As long as you are breathing, you still have chance to be surprised with what life has to offer you. Even bad things turn our different than what we expect. "Life offers us a thousand chances, all we have to do is get one." Let life surprise you.  

- - - - - - - 

Enough of the SF movies for now. I'm in the mood of some throwback movies. So have you already watched Under the Tuscan Sun? Let me know your thoughts.